We travel to the future, the past and the nightmares in between

 

Lost Girl Quotes

Season 3

Episode 01 Episode 02 Episode 03 Episode 04 Episode 05 Episode 06 Episode 07 Episode 08 Episode 09 Episode 10 Episode 11 Episode 12 Episode 13

Season 3 Episode 13: "Those Who Wander"

Bo: I swear, Tamsin, I'll kill you if you don't wake up.

Amanda: Poor Tam Tam, such a fugly sleeper.

Amanda: Uh, bad guy. Like Voldemort bad.

Bo: A shit storm of Fae proportions.

Tamsin: I knew I was a goner, I didn't think I was going to wake up in slut heaven.

Bo: Well, they'll be out of luck, I don't wear underwear.

Tamsin: It sucks to get old.

Kenzi: Now let me check my very packed social calendar... um, nope, not scheduled to take any more of your guff.

Evony: No swizzle spine, I meant Trick, your beloved Blood King, is dead.

Lauren: I know better than to take advice from a sociopath.

Masimo: My, my, my, the spider and the fly, but who is spinning the web?

Tamsin: The last person who said that lost their hand.

Lauren: The Fae will find you, and they will take more than your head.

Lauren: A cross-breed. You want to become Fae?

Bo: Don't pussy-out on me now.

Tamsin: Take it easy Meryl Streep.

Evony: I have some very specific questions about the succslut's lineage.

Kenzi: You could try not being such a bitch.

Isaac: Hi, I'm Dr. Taft. How's it hanging?
Bo: Judging by your pants, high and to the left.

Bo: I'm here to get Dyson, and no mad scientist can stop me.

Lauren: The Fae have ruined my life, Bo. They have cursed my girlfriend, they have held me prisoner, sometimes literally, and all the while my brain, my talents... Don't you see? This is a chance for me to do something meaningful, to save my kind.

Isaac: So noble, I hope that doesn't rub off on me. I hope that temper doesn't rub off on me either.

Aife: If your father was here he would kill them all, and then resurrect them and then kill them again.

Bo: If these assholes want a fight, let's give 'em one.

Lauren: Don't struggle, Dyson, it's futile.

Bruce: To Clan Zamora, a gift be stowed, immune to evil deed, to blow, for he who carries sacred twig, immortality shall cling.

Bo: Oh, mom, I am so sorry.

Tamsin: Sorry, I don't think Doctor Frankenbitch is here.

Bo: All I heard, was old.
Tamsin: Baby Fae.
Bo: Dead woman.

Trick: Blood King bested by a car trunk, not on my watch.

Hale: No need to go Wrath of the Titans old man, it's only me.

Bo: Tastes like fear to me, delicious.

Tamsin: Playtime's over.

Bo: You are more alive than anyone that I have ever met.

Tamsin: You're not like anyone I have ever met.

Dyson: You're half-human, half-capit.

Kenzi: I love you.
Bruce: I love you too, Kenzi.
Kenzi: I was talking to the car.

Kenzi: Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads.

Tamsin: We've all got to die some day.

Season 3 Episode 12: "Hail, Hale"

Bo: Lauren, if you're here, and just ignoring me, I'm sorry for breaking in.

Bo: Ya, even I don't buy that line anymore.

Trick: My protégé is officially becoming the Ash, of course I'm chipper.

Kenzi: Nope, still a dick.

Hale: Damn, that is some good hooch.

Tamsin: Wow! You always bathe with weapons?

Tamsin: I just came here to drink all you liqueur, I thought you would be gone by now.

Tamsin: So, what up succubus?

Tamsin: Where do you get off being so perfect?

Bo: I'm alright, but I'm not perfect.
Tamsin: Yes you are. To me, you are. Your eyes are both brown and blue...
Bo: Tamsin, what are you doing?
Tamsin: Your heart is both strong and gentle. Your virtuous but yet your a succubus. You shouldn't be.
Bo: Be what?
Tamsin: Be real, be here.

Kenzi: Tell me your name isn't Dickface, King of the Douchebags, is it?

Kenzi: Why don't you make the impossible happen and disappear. Bye, bye.

Isaac: I got it from the same place I get everything I can't get in North America, China.

Isaac: Just think what we could do if we can find a way to turn that one negative into a positive.

Isaac: Did we just have our first fight?

Dyson: I've never seen anything so beautiful in my life.

Dyson: Can I buy you a free drink?
Bo: What a gentleman, I accept.

Dyson: You just keep getting better and better, don't you?

Evony: If it wasn't punishable by death, I would give you a taste.

Hale: If we're going to work together I am going to need you a little less All About Evil, a lot more Steel Magnolias, you feelin' me?

Hale: You should really try the orderves, they're generating quite the buzz.

Evony: Shit's about to get real.

Kenzi: Trick...
Masimo: I prefer treats actually.

Kenzi: Takes a con to know a con.

Tamsin: So one of your exes took out the other.

Dyson: Why don't you come down here and I'll show you just how strong I can really be.

Kenzi: Hero to dick in, like, six sentences, you are unbelievable.

Tamsin: This is the last time I do anything nice for you.

Evony: From this day forward, all humans claimed, or under the employ of the Fae, in this territory, will be considered terrorists, enemies of the one true state.

Hale: Kenzi, you aren't my friend, you've never been just a friend.

Hale: I've always wondered what a terrorist tasted like.

Lauren: You've used my research to poison my friend. You lied to me.

Dyson: He's been hunting us, torturing us, making us fight each other like dogs.

Season 3 Episode 11: "Adventures in Fae-bysitting"

Kenzi: Aaaand cue the blonde in the babydoll dress walking into the woods, alone.

Bo: Oh! Fresh meat, the babysitter... aaaaand the phone is ringing.

Kenzi: Oh man, this takes me back! Look at us Bo-bo.

Kenzi: Now you're sure this gated community isn't built on an ancient burial ground, portal to hell.

Kenzi: Did you accidentally sacrifice a virgin?

Kenzi: Okay, not that I don't love the idea of Bo and Kenzi playing desperate housewives, but this chicky's got nata to go on.

Kenzi: Hey, I thought only stupid girls went into the house.
Bo: Ya, unless she's got this. Then she's just awesome.

Kenzi: Please tell me you're reading 50 Shades of Grey.

Trick: How's suburbia?
Kenzi: Oh, you know, filled with tofu scarfing, crystal rubbing, budda bumping hypocrites.

Trick: People have always searched for guidance, Kenzi. Even those who need to commute.
Kenzi: You get that from your big fortune cookie book?

Kenzi: Like Fae-mnisa?

Kenzi: On the bright side, killer dead babysitter. The TV movie writes itself.

Kenzi: Honey, your like a thousand years old, I think it's kosher.

Kenzi: I have fought the Garuda, I think I can handle one ten year old.

Kenzi: Do you know what they do to little kids who don't eat their dinner? They come after them in the middle of the night from closets and under the bed.
Ethan: What does?
Kenzi: Goblins, to eat you for dinner. Oh my god, I sound like my mother!

Tamsin: Well, you said I had to be here, you did not say I had to be sober.
Dyson: You look like shit.

Dyson: Last time I checked, Bo only had five fingers on her hand.

Lauren: But you're not protecting me, you're keeping me prisoner.

Lauren: It's true what they say about power, it doesn't change people, it reveals them.

Bo: You bitches are witches.

Trick: You on that too?
Bo: Like Kenzi at a waffle bar.

Lauren: Issac, I never took you for a stalker.
Issac: Well, I prefer super-fan.

Issac: Well, my lawyers don't want me to associate with a known fugitive, so I fired them.

Ethan: You just said the B-word, the A-word, and ginger. I wanna be like super-Kenz.

Tamsin: Uh, if you're chasing tail, I so don't want to be on the ride along.

Bo: Hug, now.

Bo: I am so much better with weapons.

Kenzi: Seek closure, grasshopper.

Tamsin: This isn't a dump site, Dyson, it's a mass grave.
Dyson: Something is hunting the Fae

Season 3 Episode 10: "Delinquents"

Bo: I feel different. I feel good. Oh, this is going to be fun.

Kenzi: I'm sorry, am I interrupting your soft ball game? Could you please grab a big girl weapon?

Lauren: Surprising you with breakfast went a lot better in my head.

Kenzi: Is everyone in here non-naked?

Kenzi: This is not the Bo that I recall. So what do you say doc, body swap, Morrigan parasite, last night's sushi, which I totally may have gotten at the dollar store.

Kenzi: Where is this camp and why does Freddy Krueger live there?

Dyson: Kenzi, I'm wondering how you would feel about tapping into your inner juvey.
Kenzi: Camp's not really my thing.

Kenzi: This look wonders how the wolf man is doing post Bo's dawning.
Dyson: Fine.
Kenzi: I'm afraid that is not the answer we were looking for.

Dyson: Good, you're tapping inner juvey already. Go get 'em bad-ass.

Bo: This tree man is about to get chopped down. He ain't got nothing on lady lumberjack.

Tamsin: So, what brings you to my corner of our dark little worlds?

Bo: This is camp?
Kenzi: I'm guessing this one begins with the letters P.O.W.

Acacia: Bitch, do I look like a wizard?

Kenzi: Hey, don't knock the streets lady, the streets taught me a lot.

Dyson: I think you protest too much, I think you love wolves.
Kenzi:
Wolves wish I loved them.

Kenzi: Ya, what are going to do, pipe self-actualizations through the intercom until the killer surrenders to a group hug?

Bo: You guys find anything?
Dyson: Just our favourite shit disturber here.

Tamsin: Is this about the kiss, between Bo and I? Because it was only that once...Heck she didn't even feed off of me.

Kenzi: A Ticklebain? Sounds strangely fun and easy to beat.

Kenzi: So who here knows how to make pipe bombs?

Dyson: Bo, I think the tales of my romantic heroism may be slightly exaggerated.

Dyson: See, classic hunting technique.

Kenzi: I've seen this before, it's Klingon.

Lauren: This precious game of yours is over asshole.

Lauren: I am so sorry, Bo, but I think that I'm always gonna be asking from you, more than you can give to me.

Lauren: I feel like I'm losing myself.

Lauren: Did you know that I thought you were the enemy for a while there? That you were going to swoop in, take her away. Turns out that I've done a fine job at screwing it up all by myself.

Dyson: If you're looking for a distraction, I'm partial at bar fights and howling at the moon. Don't know it that's your cup of tea though.

Lauren: She's so stubborn.
Dyson: She can be bitchy.
Lauren: Impetuous. Brave.
Dyson: Noblehearted.
Lauren: Best Sex I will ever have.
Dyson: Gods yes!

Bo: Unless you're Kenzi or a pint of Tequila spiked ice cream, please Fae off.

Season 3 Episode 9: "The Ceremony"

Bo: For the last few days, I feel like I've been going crazy.

Bo: I'm pregnant.

Bo: How are you feeling?
Kenzi: Like Wile E. Coyote.

Kenzi: At least we're not risking a heart attack for something gross.

Kenzi: Where's the Acme company when you need 'em?

Kenzi: I'd like to point out that no escape for him means no escape for us.

Kenzi: You and Tamsin sitting in Lauren's apartment, sharing a glass of chardonnay.
Bo: It was champaign.
Kenzi: Uhh, dude! Much worse.
Bo: And a kiss.
Kenzi: A WHAT?!?!

Bo: Come on Short Stack!

Lauren: Well this upcoming Dawning ceremony has me worried, Dyson.

Dyson: It's going to be fine. I got a good feeling about it.

Dyson: Ya, sometimes it's not what you can prove, it's what you believe.

Stella: Welcome to the first phase of your Dawning.

Kenzi: That is Victoria's secret!

Elle: I didn't think you were going to be so... stunning. We're going to have so much fun.

Bo: Oh bitch, you are evil.

Bo: You keep saying that I don't know who I am, well I know this, I will not murder for pleasure.

Stella: Without a full feed, she will fail the Dawning. She will devolve. She will die.
Kenzi: She will surprise the shit out of you. And, you would think I would get tired of watching, but I never do, and I never will. Stell.

Kenzi: What happens to cats when their owners die. Who's going to pay the hydro bill? What even is hydro?

Kenzi: This is not my worried face, this is my game face. I know you are going to get through this, and I'm going to be on the other side with mojitos, because, horns or not, we gettin' drunk when this is done.
Bo: What if I'm drooling and have back hair?
Kenzi: We will get you waxed. You will always be my girl, Bo, even if you come out of there with a dong.

Kenzi: Bo is my BFF, which stands for best Fae forever.

Lauren: I've been working like a demon trying to find a serum or an antibody to something that might...

Trick: May this Dawning be your greatest triumph.

Bo: A little Bolivian Marching Powder for the road Scarface?

Bo: I will never kill innocents again, I'd rather die.

Bo: I know that I haven't always been the perfect granddaughter, and you have always been there for me, believing in me, loving me.
Trick: You've always exceeded everyone's exceptions, and this... this is not goodbye.

Bo: Believe me, I feel lucky.

Caretaker: Until you find the key is in hand, you won't go anywhere.

Trick: I've come to think of you as family, Kenzi. I hope you don't mind.

Bo: You seem awfully chipper, me being so close to death and all.

Bo: I appreciate the help, but stop cock-blocking me.

Tamsin: Hiya neighbour, great day for a wander.

Bo: 'See Bitchy Crocker's been at it again.

Dyson: God, I'm not going to be much help you if I'm crippled.

Bo: Dad?

Bo: That's the thing, I've never been big on rules.

Bo: I will reign as he did for I am his daughter. Together we will rival the masses and ride on to victory. Even death will fear us, only I will choose who lives.

Bo: So, that was Plan B?
Kenzi: Don't worry, as if I would let Trick put you down. I've seen Old Yeller, I know what's up.

Bo: I didn't expect to feel so,gooey. But then I've never been succubus kissed before.Now I know what the big dealio is.

Bo: It's like I understand something I didn't get before. I feel...
Kenzi: Like, high?
Bo: Yeah, kinda.

Stella: I had to do it, you know. Offer the human feast, to give Bo the best chance I could.

Season 3 Episode 8: "Fae-ge Against The Machine"

Bo: Here Crickety McCrickerson.

Bo: I think my shins past good fortune two hours ago.

Trick: Hale went full speak-easy. Ridiculous.

Stella: Perhaps you need to let me do my job, bartender.

Bo: If you are a cricket, I will totally kill you.

Bo: Are you on crack?

Tamsin: Well, well, well. Aren't you two cute.

Bo: This is lunch?
Tamsin: Tomato juice, celery, vodka. Looks like lunch to me.

Stella: When in doubt, always go with leather.

Bo: So I shook hands with a dark pixie and now I owe you my I-O-U?

Bo: How many sub-basements does this place have?

Bo: The feared Tong boss is a teenage hipster?

Lauren: Why do chemists like nitrates?
Bo: Why?
Lauren: Because they're cheaper than day rates.

Balzac: We must find the landlady, then use the cookie to gain entrance to Brazenwood.

Land Lady: Muzzle it bitches!

Trick: Infinity or a pit of snakes? Good choices.

Bo: So I take it this is a B Y O roadkill kind of party.

Bo: I am late for Lauren's thing, I am up to my ass in tumbleweeds and I am stuck here with you.

Bo: It's something new that I'm trying. Check it out, BoLo. It's like our Brangelina.

Tamsin: Touch me and you'll be an appendage short.

Tamsin: If you move a Squank unvoluntarily, they dissolve into tears, literally.

Bo: There's always time for an impulse buy.

Trick: Stella, I mean this will all due respect, but shut the hell up.

Bo: Time to put that cricket down for good.

Bo: You know, you really are a weirdo. Sweet, but a weirdo.

Isaac: Oh my god, the geekage was stifling, but I snagged you this.

Bo: And the award for worst girlfriend ever goes to me.

Tamsin: Here's to your Dawning. May you not die.

Bo: You weren't the one who made that deal with Balzac. You could've left at anytime.

Season 3 Episode 7: "There's Bo Place Like Home"

Trick: What did you do that time?
Bo: Beg the invisible threshold to knock me on my ass, obviously. Was I not supposed to?

Trick: You have days before you devolve into something I have to keep in a cage.
Bo: Haven't you always wanted a pet?

Trick: I see impending doom hasn't affected your sense of humour.

Bo: Sometimes you gotta know when to fold 'em, you know?

Trick: Bo is extra special, so she runs the risk of becoming extra underfae?

Stella: Why deny your fear child?
Bo: Because it's scary?

Stella: You must go home Bo. You must forgive.

Bo: I will do whatever it takes to survive this, but I will not spend one more minute that ignorant warped bigot.

Bo: I could really use some of your patented nerdness right now.

Laurel: You're practically insane anyway. You can't go by yourself.

Trick: When did you get it back?
Dyson: What?
Trick: Your love Dyson!

Trick: How are we having this conversation without booze?

Kenzi: And if you go crazy, I just needle your butt, no problemo!

Kenzi: Four pepperoni sticks and one pint of candy corn and Kenzi is awesome. Bloated, but awesome.

Bo: Maybe I'll just write a letter.
Kenzi: Dude, you have taken on the Morrigan. Your old lady should be child's play.

Kenzi: I ass-provised! Oh, was that not one of your monster fits?

Kenzi: Does a horse shit in the barn? No, seriously. Is that where they poop?

Bo: And break her heart again?
Kenzi: Two minutes ago you wanted to break her face.

Kenzi: Country makeover, gee I can't wait.

Kenzi: I feel like I fell in some Amish.
Bo: Own it Laura Ingalls.

Bo: It's double dutch.
Kenzi: You're shitting me, I thought that was only on Wii.

Jessica: God, your so weird.
Kenzi: Thank you.

Kenzi: You two go have your mom-ent, I'll grab your clothes, and my dignity.

Kenzi: Do not Dukes of Hazzard on me!

Bo: Look at them all. Horny cord-fed farm boys, buxom milk maids...

Bo: I'm not changing into a monster, I've always been one.

Kenzi: Paging the Lord of the Bumpkins.

Kenzi: Don't go all Children of the Corn on me Dougy.

Kenzi: Shit! L.P. came to the party early!

Kenzi: Oh great! Nothing bad every happens in the field.

Kenzi: Paranormal? Don't you mean Para-weird?

Kenzi: You sacrificed Superstar? Dude, Marlyn Mason is a god!

Lady Polly: Your eyes, they are like mine.

Kenzi: I guess she wasn't feeling very... well.

Bo: I'm not the Devil, Mama. I'm Fae. I'm Bo.

Doug: I had to go two towns over to get my guyliner.

Stella: Trick, I hope you haven't misjudged me. Sometimes even I like it loud.

Dyson: I knew she was Trick bait as soon as I saw her.
Trick: Trick bait? You're crazy.
Dyson: That no nonsense ball-buster thing that she's got going on, that's crack to you.

Bo: Yes, Mrs. Miyagi.

Kenzi: Can Trick set me up a Trust?

Bo: Kenzi, you can't keep hiding behind your jokes.
Kenzi: Sure I can.

Kenzi: My goodness, it was dogly farm fed fun!

Season 3 Episode 6: "The Kenzi Scale"

Tamsin: Who died and made you king?

Trick: That's always been your job, to watch over her.

Trick: I thought I chose wisely. Maybe I was wrong.

Tamsin: So sorry your friend turned crazy psycho bitch.

Anari as Kenzi: So peace bottle blond.

Bo: Are you scared of me? Are You?

Bo: I will never forgive you for this.

Kenzi: If you're going to rip of my look, at least respect the Kenzi brand.

Anari as Kenzi: Call me crazy, but eating ever day is a bit much, don't you think?

Evony: A little bird told me of the little succu-bitch's blow out at the Dal.
Tamsin: What do you want?
Evony: Bo... strung up and executed.

Evony: I hope you haven't fallen in love with the Happy Sunshine Gang on your exchange program with the light.

Evony: Would it kill you to smile? All that attitude will only give you wrinkles.

Bo: Just another reason not to waste my breath talking to you.

Dyson: Why is Bo out of her bonds?
Tamsin: She needed some exercise.

Tamsin: Funny, people never seem to learn. Don't mess with a Valkyrie.

Tamsin: Come on Shawshank, we're running out of time.

Trick: All I'm saying is that maybe we are looking in the wrong place.

Dyson: Thanks for the hangover headache. Didn't even have the pleasure of getting drunk with you first.

Dyson: I feel like I left my head under the boulder that crushed it.

Kenzi: May the force... be... with... me.

Kenzi: Sorry guys. I ain't dog food.

Tamsin: Jeez. You smell like you smoke eight packs a day. Take a knee soldier.

Anari as Kenzi: C'mon Dyson, we're finally alone. Don't tell me you've never thought about this before.

Tamsin: My friends wouldn't even walk two blocks if I was stuck in a bear trap.
Bo: Then you need new ones.

Bo: She's a... She's Kenzi. She's smart, and honest, and kind, and she makes me feel normal and special, all at the same time. She is my heart Tamsin.

Bo: You tell anyone about this and I will kill you.

Tamsin: I said feed off of me, not suck me dry!

Bo: Wow. That was amazing! I've never tastes chi like that!
Tamsin: It's not the first time someone said that about me.

Kenzi: I just want a burger and fries and a second burger.

Trick: How are you feeling after your milkshake?
Bo: Well I had to drink another milkshake to wash the taste out of my mouth...

Season 3 Episode 5: "Faes Wide Shut"

Lauren: He's a Hydra. Nine heads.
Bo: I see only one.
Lauren: Not those kind of heads.

Lauren: I will be a while before she blooms. She's taken a thousand year vow of chastity.
Bo: I can make her change her mind.

Lauren: You are an irresistible, unstoppable, sex machine.

Trick: What evening adventures are afoot for the loveliest ladies in six counties?

Trick: So... many... glasses... must... polish.

Kenzi: It just keeps going like a Grateful Dead jam.

Kenzi: Does that mean you will be underfoot experimenting for quite some time?

Bo: Maybe a topic for conversation for a non-naked time, Kenzi?

Kenzi: No, your right. Knocking bits is way more important than saving lives.

Bo: You know, one day we will get past women stabbing each other in the back and clawing each other's eyes out for a guy.

Bo: I'd like to welcome everyone to Bo's first ever two for one special.

Delia: Graeme and I have been together for ever, like six months at least. We were soul mates.

Bo: Mmm... Smörgåsbord.

Bo: Wow. I haven't seen this many delicious buns since bake-off night at the Dal.
Kenzi: Just think of wrinkled old men and their wrinkled old raisins.

Bo: Doctor Louis' lover.

Bo: I think Hefner summers here.

Bo: I'll see if I can find a randy Fae and keep it from molesting any more soft warm humans.

Bo: Wow. A little bit of Fae Extacy goes a long way.

Roman: You should see this place after hours. Black tie, often nothing else.

Tamsin: Cause of death, allergic reaction to a Succubus, by any chance?

Trick: What can I say, it was the 70s. The 1870s.

Trick: Believe you me, there is no bash like a bacchanalian bash.

Kenzi: You want to get kinky at a sex club with your granddaughter?

Tamsin: Until we crack this case, I'll be your very sexy shadow.

Bo: Kenzi, you hate casinos. Or as you call them, amateur hour for suckers.

Tamsin: Funny, Bo didn't tell me to dress for the sex ball.

Bo: It's time to use what the good goddess gave me.

Roman: Oh my, my. Did someone get her chocolate in his peanut butter?

Bo: Holy octopussy!

Bo: How about you drop the doctor or I go reservoir dogs on your ear.

Bo: Who says a girl's gotta choose?

Tamsin: Hold up. You banged a sea cow?

Kenzi: That was seven kinds of awesome!

Bo: You're amazing.
Lauren: Yes I am.

Season 3 Episode 4: "Fae-ed to Black"

Lauren: I have cultures growing so out of control that my actual control cultures have mutated.

Bo: I thought I was your to-do list.

Lloyd: This is going to be amazing, no?
Tamsin: I gotta go with no dude.

Tamsin: Well, there you have it mans living his dream, can we go now?
Dyson: Can you at least pretend to try?

Dyson: You are so bad at this...
Tamsin: What? The man wants to live in his crazy circus fantasy, who cares? Live and let live.

Dyson: Do you remember how the last three ended up?
Tamsin: Hmm, you mean splat, squish, kaboom?

Bo: Do we seriously not have any chocolate in this place?

Bo: Did you just throw a pillow at me?
Kenzi: That is a good question that I would like to answer in two parts. A: Yes. B: I would love to have a heart-to-heart, thank you so much for asking.

Kenzi: And from what I hear, super bang-able.
Bo: Why is everything always about sex?
Kenzi: Uh, Wondersnatch. Hi, have we met?

Kenzi: You wicked, wicked Norn. What did you do to me?

Dyson: What happened to your date with Mr. Eight-pack?
Tamsin: This girl only needs 10 minutes.

Tamsin: Tox Screen on street pizza?
Dyson: Can you not call him that?
Tamsin: Tox Screen on the street pasta?

Tamsin: This is the part that we go question therapists...

Tamsin: So we go undercover. I could be a great therapist.
Dyson: We are trying to prevent these people from killing themselves, Tamsin.

Dyson: You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you little...
Bo: Smart, gorgeous, tall?
Dyson: Hungry.

Bo: What about Dr. Nemo and Dr. Bob?
Tabitha: Hehe. Well this is Dr. Nemo, and Dr. Bob is our resident kitty. He normally hangs out in Dr. Palmer's office.

Hale: I'm sorry, what do you have to unload out of your butt?

Hale: Look lil' mamma, I'm up to my moonshine in Ash biz. Can we do lunch Friday?

Kenzi: The Ash has his own Black Platinum?
Hale: Honey, Black Platinum ain't got nothing on that.

Rolly: I am Captain Humongous, able to stop cars with one hand, lift thousands of pounds and take anyone out with one punch.

Bo: Stop moving! You're so bendy.

Tamsin: It's like Occam's Beard Trimmer.
Dyson: Razer.
Tamsin: Whatever.

Bo: I don't know what I like about her most, her warmth or her charm.

Dyson: It's either me or an ambulance, I'm not kidding.

Kenzi: If there's anything I learned from Tim Gunn is that there is always time for fashion.

Hale: This isn't a spring break in Cancun.

Bo: Seriously? Your kryptonite is kitty litter?

Tamsin: Is that a mermaid costume?

Trick: Raksasha!
Tamsin: Bless you.
Trick: No, Palmer might be a Raksasha.

Trick: We all love Kenzi, but make no mistake, she's not one of us.

Dr. Palmer: What is it with people and daggers?

Tamsin: So Dyson's out there with a monster on his tail and all we got to go on is Dr. Dipshit.

Tamsin: Geez, if you want to sleep with me, you didn't need to get up on a ledge to get my attention.

Tamsin: Okay, I'm warning you. Don't unwrap the wang!

Tamsin: You got your work cut out for you, because this one wants to half lion and half eagle and full asshole. Here kitty-kitty.

Tamsin: How much lead are we talkin' here?

Tamsin: Alright. Let's get tanked.

Dyson: You buying?
Tamsin: Only if you're a good little boy. Are you?
Dyson: No, I'm a very, very bad wolf.
Tamsin: Good answer.

Kenzi: Dude. Stop Ash-blocking the Kenz.

Season 3 Episode 3: "ConFaegion"

Kenzi: Did ya like that part where I pretended to fall on my ass but was actually a stealth missle lasering in on target?

Bo: She thinks you are immature, irresponsible and clingy.
Kenzi: She does?
Bo: Oh, you've said those things about yourself.
Kenzi: Ya, but when I say it is adorable.

Lauren: EKG, MRI, EMV...
Vex: Oh, wake me up when you get to S&M.

Vex: Then why can't I...
Lauren: Get it up?
Vex: Oh a regular riot, you are.

Vex: You shall feel the wrath of Vex.

Vex: It can't be easy with keeping up to energizer Succu-bunny.

Vex: Hello. Barkeep, I'm talking to you.
Trick: Still?

Tamsin: We've been listening to your same sad story for days. The dark doesn't want me, the light can't stand me, my friends... Oh, wait, he doesn't have any friends does he?
Dyson: Sucks to be Vex.

Bo: Is this how you role now, tough love?
Hale: You handcuffed the Morrigan to a bed and turned it into a Kodak moment.

Bo: I'm not going to be pressured into choose a side out of fear.
Hale: Can't blame an Ash for trying.

Evony: I am beautiful in restraints.

Kenzi: Can we forget about your fae-self for about a nano-second and talk about something really important?
Vex: Doubtful.
Kenzi: Mascara.
Vex: You have my attention.

Vex: Ya, iPads, iPhones, electricity, its all just a fad, really. The future is analog and all that, I'm telling you.

Vex: Did you happen to riffle through my duffle bag and scarf down a couple yellow pills with tigers on them?

Bo: I think Dyson likes me.
Lauren: Say what?
Bo: Don't tell anyone this, but I think I might kiss him.

Bo: Wow, you're really hot. Ever kissed a girl?

Bo: Bzzzt! We have now swapped brains. Hi, I'm Doctor Lauren, I don't like to have any fun.

Lauren: Bo, you're really starting to scare me
Bo: Rawr!
Lauren: Ok, Bo, just listen to me.
Bo: RAWR!!

Bo: Well, there was this really gross guy with a magic stick.

Dyson: Are you playing with yourself?
Tamsin: Did somebody spike your brooski?
Dyson: Dude! This one time, that totally happened. I got to be Kenzi. Nailed it!

Tamsin: Bo and Dyson sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G.

Bo: Can I have the car keys?
Trick: No.
Bo: If I don't get the car keys, I will count to a hundred... in French.
Trick: Good grief.

Bo: Don't Kanye me.

Vex: You've got to forget about brown. Black is always the new black.

Vex: So, Bo shagged them both daft?

Lauren: We have a situation.
Kenzi: More like a shit-uation.

Vex: This little piggy is about to go to market.

Kenzi: All I did was pick up this stupid Shillelagh and suddenly I'm Darth Vader.

Kenzi: The shaft is kinda crazy glued to my hand.
Vex: Ya, that happened to me once. Painful.

Kenzi: Worst hand job ever!

Kenzi: Not my bad, stick bad.

Kenzi: Ewwwww! With a double side of hurl!

Bo: What is with your voice? It's all Scottish-y.

Kenzi: What is that? Why are you always rolling your eyes at me, with your normal upbringing & your medical degree.

Kenzi: I set up an early warning system outside, Home Alone style.

Vex: The three little piggies are back, and this time it's personal.

Bo: Time for mamma to bring home the bacon.

Trick: That's how destiny works. One day your you, and the next day...
Kenzi: I'm a superhero.

Kenzi: Pro, I could be awesome forever. Con, I would have to learn how to do everything with my left hand. And I mean everything.

Hale: You ever pull a stunt like this again I'll personally rip off your head and shove it up your little white ass!

Season 3 Episode 2: "SubterrFaenean"

Vex: Can someone remind me why we pay good money to fraternize with the bits we flush down the toilet?

Aussie: Has anyone ever told you, you look like Robert Smith from The Cure?
Kenzi: I told you to stay home.
Vex: Home? With front row seats to the smash up clam derby? No, thank you.

Lauren: You know, we really need to start stocking our fridge with sports drinks. Because my medulla oblongata is screaming for hydration. I can literally feel my equilibrium...

Bo: The geek speak is working, Doctor.

Lauren: I must be the only woman in history that has to pretend to be a ditz to repel sexual attraction.

Kenzi: Mother, may I kill the freeloader?

Bo: If you go near my girlfriend, the little balls hanging from our Christmas tree next year will have a certain, panache.

Vex: Hook up illegal cable and what do I get? Threats against my junk. Typical!

Tamsin: Twenty bucks if you kill the white boy.

Tamsin: Bet on the wrong guy again. Story of my life.

Tamsin: Didn't you know? You and I are part of a little peace project between dark and light. You should read your newsletter.
Dyson: I just do the crossword.

Bo: There is still so much about you I don't know.

Kenzi: Well, I'm a riddle, wrapped in an enigma, shrouded in ooh suki suki now.

Trick: Weavers are mystics. They specialize in finding what's haunting a person. Right now she's specializing in haunting me. Drunk old windbag.

Kenzi: At least he eats organic.
Bo: Didn't do much for his eyesight though.

Bo: Would you believe we took a wrong turn at Albuquerque?

Dyson: I'd be a fool to trust someone from your team.
Tamsin: My team? Do you mean Dark Fae or women?

Bo: You touch my friend and things are going to get a lot less civilized.

Bo: What Happened? How'd we get here?
Vex: I dunno, but if I had to guess, I'd say years of latent sexual tension.

Kenzi: Last thing I remember is being at the Cistern chapel, and then we got crock-blocked.

Bo: Are you wearing my kimono again?
Vex: It's alright, I had it altered. Now, it fits me to perfection.

Vex: Even the likes of Ebeneezer Scrooge wouldn't stoop so low as to beat a cripple.

Tamsin: Did you know he was Dark Fae when you sucked him dry like a little crab leg?

Bo: Hang on one second here. You're new partner is Dark Fae?!

Tamsin: As good as this good cop, horny cop is, I'm gonna get coffee.

Dyson: I know she didn't do it.
Tamsin: Because when God was handing out brains, you took a second dick?

Tamsin: That bitch is doomed!

Kenzi: Why isn't there an app for navigating shipyards? There's an app for turning people into zombies.

Tamsin: Thanks for coming back. I was beginning to think I wasn't gonna get to kick your cute little ass today.

Tamsin: You know, if I didn't hate Bo so much, I'd actually start to like her.
Dyson: She has that effect on people.

Bo: The music, it's so pretty.
Kenzi: Like a lullaby. Or a bird.
Bo: Or a funeral dirge to a death march.

Tamsin: Does that blood in your mouth taste good?
Dyson: Yeah.
Tamsin: Do I taste good?
Dyson: Yeah.

Bo: What'd you see?
Eunice: You know what? It was so, beautiful. I think it was something you ate.

Bo: Why are people always lying to me?

Season 3 Episode 1: "Caged Fae"

Bo: I know, I know. What's a nice girl like me doing in a place like this huh?

Bo: Eeny, meeny, miny...Bo!

Bo: Go on with your bad selves. As for the rest of you, drinks, are on, me!

Dyson: Give it up succubus!
Bo: You leave me breathless, wolf!
Dyson: As I recall, you used to like that.
Bo: I used to like a lot of silly things.

Dyson: Your crime spree, ends now!
Bo: Whaddya say Trick? Should I beg for sanctuary?

Bo: I'm Bo, bitches! And I'll be back!

Bo: I barely know my mom. Though this one time she did sleep with my boyfriend and try to kill me.

Bo: So what's with the femi-nazis?
Sylvie: They're Amazons

Bo: Well, it's a helluva sad story Doc. I've loved, I've lost, my dog done run away

Lauren: Don't you have a baton to polish or something?

Bo: That was so bad-ass!
Lauren: Your bad. You've been a bad, bad girl!
Bo: Best role play ever!

Bo: Wow! What is that smell?
Lauren: I coated myself in the secretions of skunk ape to pass as Fae.

Bo: A giant rock this early in our relationship. Are you saying you want a commitment?
Lauren: Are you saying this is a relationship?

Kenzi: You can't stop me. Your troll can't stop me. I'm calling a meeting, no questions Ashked!

Kenzi: You need to fix this. You're the Ash now!
Hale: That's right little mama. I am.

Kenzi: Oh yeah? When shit gets real, what is she gonna do, science people to death?

Hale: The Amazon's won't listen to me.
Kenzi: Because of your stupid penis?
Hale: I prefer untested leadership.

Kenzi: This clink's actually built on top of, get laid, lines?
Trick: Ley lines.

Trick: This gin joint was the swinginest Hootinannie in town.
Hale: Ya, one more quip like that and Trick will outfit you in a pair of cement pradas.
Trick: Me & the flappers used to get geezed on wobbly pops.

Bo: Golly warden, I just saw something shiny in the yard and I just had to have it for my rock collection.

Vex: You work with these humans every day and you've never thought of eating one of them? Not even this fat one?
Dyson: You break my cover and I will rip your balls off and sell them to a certain butcher we know.

Vex: Hey! I could be your new partner. With the big stick and the handcuffs, ooh la!

Kenzi: You know the drill, no wangs allowed
Dyson: Face of an angel, voice of a poet.

Kenzi: Kenzi Montclair. I'm Bo's honeybee and I'm here for some sugar.
Guard: But you're human.
Kenzi: Trust me. The shorter the lifespan, the deeper the quicksand.

Bo: You wore your redneck wig!
Kenzi: And my monster truck thong. Go method or go home!

Bo: This is your last chance to leave Jobina.
Jobina: And let you scrub in? You thought the speculum was salad tongs.

Vex: Authoritative, right? You have the right to remain, my bitch!

Vex: I have a sudden urge to don a fedora and dance the Charleston and I don't dance the Charleston... unless you want me to.

Lauren: Wow! We're not the only things undercover at Hecuba!

Bo: I'm gonna go check on her later
Kenzi: Is that what the kids are callin' it these days?

Kenzi: All Hale the new Ash. See what I did there?

Bo: My father, was most certainly dark, but what if he was a monster? What does that make me?

 

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